From the Mouth of A Child

This was when I could actually eat cheesecake!

As you can imagine the last four months have taken a toll on me as a wife but also has a mom.... it is so difficult to drum up energy to play and enjoy time with my very active 7 year old when I feel as though I have been hit by a car.

Last night we were in our jammies at 5:30 and snuggling on the couch (because that is what I had the energy for).  As I started to braid her hair, I commented that it had been a long time since I had braided her hair and she said, it's because you have been in the hospital so much.   I guess my three trips to the ER have made an impact on her, but she also may be thinking that every time I went to the doctor it was a trip to the hospital.

When Ella sees me struggling, she will often come up and give me a hug and pray for me on the spot, that does my heart good to know that my child is praying for me.  I think if I hadn't been crying already I would have started the first time she prayed for me.

Every morning before school Ella would help me get out my supplements for the day.... I wrote how many of each on the top of each bottle and she counts them out and she makes me my Relax Max Drink while Joel makes my smoothie.  The only down side to it is the a few of the lids are the same size and they may or may not have been switched last night - but I caught it after just one day of take an extra B vitamin or two.

We have had to do life a little different the last few months.  I have missed some of her games and activities which I hate to do, but she has handled it as well as possible.  We have eaten supper on the couch a lot, we have watched a lot of Tiny House shows, and played a lot of Rack-O - but for such a time as this.... this is what we do to get by.

On good days we go outside and I sit on the chair and she plays, and helps me in the garden.  Now I don't want to paint a picture that it is always daisies and roses, because it surely is not.... we struggle I struggle to be patient, I struggle to be energetic and Ella struggles to be understanding, and struggles to not complain about not being able to do something she wants to do.

All this to say - I am so thankful for my little family and all they have done for me.  God knew that I would need them and I have needed them and continue to need them to help me walk through this journey.  When I don't feel like I have much to be thankful for..... I am reminded I am blessed beyond measure with a family who loves me and I count that as a true blessing from God!

So thankful for these two blessings!!!

With All My Heart

Today marks the start of what I hope to be a new February tradition for our family. The wall of hearts were put up last night and each day between now and Valentine's Day my daughter and my husband each get to turn over a heart to reveal something we love about them. Joel and I worked together to make Ella's and Ella worked with me to come up with some for her Daddy. As we were finishing up Joel's hearts Ella asked about mine... I told her I didn't make any for myself, so she decided she would make some for me and she knows what each one says despite the fact that all I see are jumbled letters - they truly are a message of love. 

For each on of Ella's heart we made a point to find a scripture to go along with it so it was not only a message of what we loved about her, it was also an opportunity for us to have a little devotion time together as we talk about who God made her to be and how God has already gifted her in many ways.  

My hope and prayer is that she will always know she is loved not for what she can do, but for who she is in Christ!!

A prayer for my sleeping child

There are few things quite as precious as a sleeping child.... whether it has been a great day filled with learning and obedience, or a day that seemed to be the worst of days filled with tears, whining, and what seemed like constant disobedience.  My heart melts over my sleeping child.  Sometimes I just stare at her, looking at her precious peaceful face.  Sometimes I cry tears of joy because of the amazing gift that God so gracious entrusted to me.  And sometimes I honestly look at my sleeping child and celebrate that the day is done... and tomorrow is a new day (if you know what I mean).

Lately I have been convicted of my need to do a better job at praying more specifically for people and for situations.  I am okay at mentioning names before the Lord, but not so good at being detailed in what I pray for.  That conviction has also rolled over into my need to do a better job praying specifically for my child and my husband.

Our evening routine involves a book or two, an evening prayer, and singing.  After the singing is through I usually kiss my sleeping child and quietly exit the room being careful to not wake the sleeping child.... however lately I have found myself lingering, looking and praying.  As I began to think about how to pray for her, I thought of the old hymn... Take My Life and Let It Be and it prompted me to pray like this....

I lay my hand and her HEAD - Lord, give her wisdom.  Help her grow in her knowledge of you. Help her to make wise decisions that would bring you honor.  Fill her mind with godly things and protect her from lies of the world.  Help her to think before she acts, so that she can be a light for you.

EARS - Lord, help her to listen - as the saying says you give us two ears to hear and one mouth to talk let us listen more than we talk.  Help her to be still and listen to that still small voice.  Help her to hear the cries of the people around her who need loved and cared for.  Help her to listen and obey as we seek to teach her your ways.  Give her ears that are fully tuned to your voice.

EYES - Protect my little girl's eyes... help us to teach her what is good to see and what to turn away from.  Give her eyes filled with compassion for those that she sees to be hurting around her.  Help her to be sensitive to those that she sees that look or act differently - help her to see them just as you see her.

MOUTH - You tell us our tongues are sharper than a two edged sword..... help her tongue to be used to build people up and not tear them down.  Help her to speak truth but in a way that is filled with compassion.  Help her words to be kind and caring.  Help her to use her mouth to tell others of your amazing goodness.  Let her be your mouth piece to a hurting world that needs to know of your love.

HANDS - Let these hands be used to serve you.  Let them be used to build for your kingdom and not be used to hurt others or for selfish things.  Use her hands to help bring joy to the brokenhearted and healing for the sick (she told me she wants to be a doctor, so I guess it is never to early to start praying if that is what she does).

I lay my hand on her BACK - this precious little body Lord is a gift from you.... protect her body from harm.  Keep away anyone that would want to hurt her or take advantage of her.  Lord wrap your arms around her as she sleeps so that she can be comforted to know that she is safe in your arms. Thank you for the gift that she is to me and so many others...thank you for her!

LEGS - You tell us that we are to run a race not of speed but of endurance.... give her legs to run that race and run it well.  Lead her on the path that is the straight and narrow.  Give her patience in the journey but help her to follow the leader of the pack, which is you.

FEET - Lord - these tiny feet will walk many miles over her lifetime... may those steps by following in your footsteps.  Let her be your hands and feet and be like You to other people.  Though it would be so hard to let her go far away, Lord if you call her to serve around the world... help me to be willing to let her go.... and help her to be willing to be obedient.

Lord for this little child, my baby, your gift to us... I pray your hand of protection, and pray that you amazing love would radiate from this child.  Thank you for sharing her with us!  AMEN